What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

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A girl gets raped -teagan d

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What did Jesus say when he walked on water? I'm drowning

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

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A Jewish man with a boner walks into a wall. What hit the wall first? Probably his penis.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the white bartender kick out a black man and his Mexican friend out of the bar? It was closing time

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mikey is cute

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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