Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

Why does Santa go down your chimney? Because he is to retarded to use the door.

1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

A Brunette a ginger and a blonde were getting their hair done? WHich side of the bus did they sit on? Why did i put a question mark on the first part?

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

ur mother

What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

who is jacked and looks like a beast? • James Cornish

What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

What's black, white, and red all over? A intro of darkness, then redness then whiteness

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

What's orange and can fly through walls? A Magic Orange.

What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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