What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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Women's Rights

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time to spruce up!

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a man? One's tall the other's not

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When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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your mamas so fat all she gets for christmas and her birthday is girdles!

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Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

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Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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A man and his friend are talking. The man says, "You know what's funny? Sometimes you mean to say one thing and you say a completely different thing. Like the other day I wanted to buy a ticket to pittsburgh, but the lady I was buying it from had very large breasts, so I accidentally said 'Can I have a picket to titsburgh?'" And the other guy says, "Yeah, man, it's really funny you say that, the other day I meant to ask my wife to pass the salt, and I said 'you whore, you ruined my life'"

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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ecks! why zee?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops