A seal walks into a club.

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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whats worse than school? Summer school

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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What did the little boy with no arms get for cristmas? A football.

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My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

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What do a dog and a tree have in common? BARK!

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped and left to die in the snow.

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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A cat playing laser tag.

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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