A seal walks into a club.

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What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

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If i was a painting... Id hang myself

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

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A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

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What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

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What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

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What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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