My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

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The following is neither a joke or anti-joke. It's a brainteaser. It's called the Monty Hall Problem. Suppose you're on a game show, and you're given the choice of three doors: Behind 1 door is a car; behind the other 2 doors are goats. You then choose a door. The host then opens another door and reveals a goat. He then says to you, "Do you want to stick with your choice or switch?" Is it to your advantage to switch your choice? The correct answer yes, switching gives you a better odds of winning. Why? There is a simple way to understand it without the mathematical demonstration. Suppose we have the three doors 1, 2 3 and the number 2 is the winner. If you choose not to change , of course the chances to win is 1/3. Now. what happens if you decide to change? The answer is that if you initially chose an incorrect door, you will always win. In the example, if you initially chose the door 1, the presenter will open door 3(because the door 2 is the winner so he can't open that door) So if you change you will win. The same happens if you initially chose door 3(the presenter will open door 1 and if you change you will win). You will only loose if you initially chose door 2(the presenter will open door 1 or 3, and when changing you will loose) So the conclusion is that if you always decide to change, if initially you have chosen ANY(and any in capital letters!) of the TWO incorrect doors you will win. So the chances when changing is 2/3.

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why did the old lady come home late? she got raped.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Guy 1: I had a Energy Drink the other day, I crashed. Guy 2: Really? That must of sucked. Guy 1: Yeah, the family in the other car died.

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

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>>---------------------------------[ knee ]------------------------->>>

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

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How do you confuse and idiot? Purple.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

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When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

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For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

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What do you call a chicken with its head cut off? A dead chicken. Most likely ready to be cooked/eaten

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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