what did the judgmental teacher say to a challenged student? your stupid

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagen? Five.

What happens when you cross a Kangaroo with an Elephant? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

There was 2 men walking down the street one fell on the floor from a heart attack and the other started to molest a lonely child. They then heard a bang and they found a dead baby lying in a bin. The moral of this story is to.... Knock Knock Whos there? The Police? The Police who? The police we are here to inform you your nan got hit by a truck and got decapitaited, Sorry but your nan is dead. way

Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

why did my girlfriend get pregnet? i didn's use a condom, and my semen entered her long muscular tube, also known as a vagina.

What did God say to the crying man? God doesn't exist.

why did my iphone screen get scratched :(? because i dropped it ):

What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender

what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

Why is OK SUK WHANG's name on a gravestone? She thought she was way better than okay.

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

tom pauling

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

Knock knock. Who's there? Steve Jensen. Oh hi Steve, come in.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...