I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

thumb_up thumb_down +26

what is red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket Waht is blue and looks like a bucket? (99% of the time they will say "a blue bucket") No, a red bucket in disguise!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: Why do black people like fried chicken? A: Because it tastes delicious!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A daring man once said "Here goes nothing!" Anddd nothing happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

thumb_up thumb_down -29

They see me rolling' Up my sleeves for some volunteer work at the local shelter

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Who can you NOT apply the term "Gentle Giant" to? Dwarfs.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Why did the White guy wanna be Black? He liked basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -6

knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was 6 afraid of 12? Because 12 used to beat up 6 and now 6 has a restraining order against 12. 12 has to stay at least 5 numbers away from 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops