What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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obama

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths, thus he suffered survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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Hi

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What is pink and gets wet a tounge

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a women. Statutory rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

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Yo mamma is so old that she died.

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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