A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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run farther?

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There are 2 carrots sitting in a basket. One carrot says to the other; I'm a carrot! The other carrot does not reply, because carrots do not speak. Now consider the possibility, that the first carrot was a talking monkey.

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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http://adf.ly/C8MqG

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Women deserve equal rights.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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Larchmont Park is the biggest shithole in the european union - Only the jippo part tho, lots of flies live in that part <3

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

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There was once a little boy... Boy: Daddy, I am so proud of you that when I grow up I want to be just like you! God: Son how dareth thou! That is a horribleth and shameful wish! I just called the adoption agency thy areth noteth my... er.. sonneth anymoreth! NOW GO TO HELL! Oh, and you get same powers as I by the way, just for Good measure or something, except I can destroy you whenever I want, I just do not want to because your evil will hopefully make me look good in comparison after I rid the world of the first testament anyways :P Boy: Yay? :( Where is hell by the way? Moral: That little boy grew up to become... SUPERMAN! While Satan never discovered what hell was since its a concept added by corrupt priests around the 1700`s in order to scare people into following their God instead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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How do you make a person dissapear? You can't that would break the laws of physics, so therefore rendered impossibe.

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How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

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Why did the boy with cancer cross the road? He was hoping to get hit by a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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