Q: what is white and can't climb trees? A: A refrigerator

A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who, Your Doctor, you have 5 months to live

What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

:O + :P = 69

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

what do you call gingers ugly.

What do you call someone with no legs nor arms? Mat

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's newborn baby? Neither has she.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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