Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Yo mamas so fat she is obese

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What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

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A young gay man comes out of the closet to his conservative, Christian parents. Everything went better than expected.

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How do you stop a fridge from making contact with the ground? Cut its cable's ground pin.

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69

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Arron Glass

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

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Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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knock. knock. whos there? ur mom now put ur pants back on

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What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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