What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

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What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

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How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

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Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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You know you guys are suppose to post jokes, not basketball comments.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Oh my god, I'm on fire! Help me, help me, oh God it's everywhere!

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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2 Black men walk into the bar.. Guess what? There still black.

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Q: What's the hardest part about throwing a baby down the stairs? A: My dick.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

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why couldnt helen keller drive she was a woman

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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