You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... But that's disgusting.

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cops:knock- knock person: who's there? cops: the cops person: the cops who cops: we found the body #Casey Anthony

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Why was the boy crying? he was so happy his mom bought him a playstation 3

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A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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What did the Rabbit say to the horse? They are both completly differebt species and cannot communicate. Therefore, the rabbit said nothing.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What did the boy with a crippled arm get for his birthday? A guitar.

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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why was the man gay? Because its not a choice. its a lifestyle.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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