What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

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eden stop

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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A man says to another man, "Why the long face?" He then replies, "I have an elongated face, hands, and feet due to acromegaly."

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what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

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why was the man scared of the tree because it was shady

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I just can't stand sitting down!

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Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

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What do we want? Chips!! When do we want them? Chips

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

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Roses are red Violets are red The trees are red Oh crap, the garden's on fire.

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Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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How did Steve Jobs die? Of cancer, in a bed, and surrounded by his loved ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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