Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

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What did man who had diarrhea say to the other man? "I have to go to the toilet."

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

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Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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What did the politician say to the bank robber? "Were both robbers"

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Pencils are yellow, Grass is green OK

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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Q: Why can't sally play on the swing? A: Because she has no arms Q: Who was the first to climb mount everest? A: Not Sally

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How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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