If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was mad at it wife.

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what did God say on the 7th day? -zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

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Today is May 18 2016.

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yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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You might be a redneck if you have red on your neck

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Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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kieran is a homosexual

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What is black, white, and red, and can't turn around in a hallway? A nun with a spear through her head.

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Bradley is Sexi;P just kidding!!! fatty

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Why did the man jump off the bridge. Because he found his beloved wife cheating on him with his life-long friend that he meet when they both where in pre-school.

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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What's red and sticky A DEAD BABY

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What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who's there?! ... Ditched again!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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