Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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What did the two prostitute say to each other? I dont know, i wasn't there

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What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name is not Mark.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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Where di mary go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

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What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Where did little susie go during the explosion? Everywhere :) What color were her eyes? Blue. One blew this way and one blew the other way. :p Knock, knock Who's there? Not susie :)

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yo mammas so fat when she gets cut gravy pours out

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Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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