a man texted his wife saying "hey sexy, how was your day?(;" unfortunately, she never replied because she got in a cr accident and died from texting while driving.

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Knock knock Who's there? The events which followed are described by police as the August 4th massacre in which a family of five were brutally murdered by two prison escapees who broke into the house in search of a place to hideout.

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side (The original AntiJoke)

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What's in there? Get outta there...

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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Why did the Quantum chicken cross the road? It was already on both sides.

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

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What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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