Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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A fish finds that his fishbowl is on fire. He escapes the bowl only to realize he is equally screwed.

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

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Woman's rights

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Knock Knock Who's there? Somebody who wants to come in.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

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If life gives you lemons, get some seeds from them and plant them. Then in a few years you'll have a lemon tree. Then take some lemons off that tree and throw them at people saying "Here's your stupid lemons, people".

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How did Clumsy Clearance eat shit? He was in the Human Centipede.

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Knock knock. Come in.

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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What do you call love at first sight? A broken heart.

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What's funny about the old man who got stabbed? Nothing... you're a sick person!

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

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hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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whats the best thing about polio...death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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