Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

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What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

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What does the president and the prime minister of china have in common, Sickle cell anemia. 342

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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*Knock, Knock* Who's there? George. George who? George Ronald.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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Today is May 18 2016.

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Person One: Three bears are eating tacos, seventeen bears are making margaritas, how many bears are going to the supermarket to get overly prices expired two percent milk? Person Two: ...Who gives a shit!!!!!!!!?!?!?!?!!!? Person One: No! That is incorrect!..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................its 16

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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