What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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Jay Leno: The economy is so bad.. Audience: how bad is it?! Jay Leno: Very bad.

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Why was Hellen Kellers leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

A wealthy businessman gets into an elevator with a poor, ragged janitor. They take the elevator up 19 floors. As the businessman leaves the elevator, he turns to the janitor and says, "Good day to you, sir."

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

What's the difference between a pancake? They both taste good with jam

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

Why couldn't the boy see his sick mother? Because he was blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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