What does a girl get from a dead MAN:)?? Nothing he is dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

Girls soccer

Holocaust jokes aren't funny. Anne Frankly, I do not stand for them.

Why did hale say I have but one life to give for my country? He has one life

What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

a man walks into a bar..... the man pulls out a gun and robs the place as he is exiting he bumps into a child the child falls in the street and is crushed by a bus. the bus in an attempt to avoid the child swerves and hits a maternity clinic next to a gas station that promptly explodes. the robber so distraught he trys to shoot himself but the gun misfired and the man was arrested and was raped repeatedly in prison...he now has aids...

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

a man was shot.... he died

Q. What gets louder as it gets smaller? A. A baby in a paper shredder

Swag.

Why didn't Joe have any friends? Because according to Thomas Hobbes man is anti-social by nature and therefore the only friends that he has are purely to reach his own ends and thus Joe cannot truly have friends in the sense that many use the word.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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