What's worse then the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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Why did princess diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing her seatbelt

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So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

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What did the pacific ocean do to the Atlantic ocean? He waved.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

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shut up elliot

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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why couldnt the kid get off the couch when his mom asked him to? he was paralyzed

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Three men of different ethnic and socio-economic upbringings enter a pub. A strange situation befalls them or a question is posed. The first two respond in turn, in manners typical of their profession or educational background. The third, however, either draws on his specific expertise and responds so as to outwit the others, or makes an egregious and pun-filled blunder, leaving himself open to mockery by his peers.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

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Q: what did the man say to the woman when he wanted her to leave? A: please leave

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your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

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Who's on first? Garvey.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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drew edminstin is a rat

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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So, a blind man walks into a bar with assistance from his friend. He orders a drink and the bartender complies. He then spills his drunk and then slips in it. He lays on the floor, his head hurting. He cries, knowing he never should've tried to stare at the sun for ten seconds.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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