Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Q: What's the difference between a mountain goat and a pitching wedge? A: A lot.

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Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? She had no friends.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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Women's rights.

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Fags are gay.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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Just found out that it doesn't work.

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

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Hello

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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A blonde walks into a hairdressers salon. She gets her hair cut.

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know but you're a sick person even thinking about it.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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