A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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Jaden McMichael

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Q: You know what you should add to your recipe? A: No, not really. Tell me. Q: What? Are you expecting an answer now? Why don't you just shoot me, huh?! Pee on my clothes and set them on fire! You racist son of an **orange**.... It certainly tastes better with oranges.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

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why did the little girl get her hair cut? she has cancer.

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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