Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I love you You love me We all grab 2X4's Barney's on the floor No more purple dinosaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Little Miss Muffet Sat on a tuffet, Eating her curds and whey; Along came a spider, Who sat down beside her But was offered the window seat, Because this was Little Miss Muffet's stop

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

ajkswhfuilafhgkfdgbluft

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Flying aboriginal on a magic carpet

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Poems don't have to rhyme... Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

thumb_up thumb_down +20

An irish man walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How did the black person die? Of old age

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between andreas and a dog? the dog has a tail.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops