why did the little girl get her hair cut? she has cancer.

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Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon A: Ones fun to beat with a sledgehammer, the other ones a watermelon

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

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What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

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Why did the cow stop running? - He ran out of breath

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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A girl walks into a bar and the bartender says, "why is your face so tan?" And she replies "I just got back from the beach."

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

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What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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kevin kim

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Q Why did the man run away from his shadow? A He didn't it was physicaly impossible.

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How do you stop a charging rhinocerous? Nuke africa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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