What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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How do you get a black guy down from your tree? You can't, because there aint any.

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What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

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A brunette child with a blond mother is crying. Why? Because his father was just mauled by a Scandinavian dragon.

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Why did Jimmy miss a question on his test? He put D

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In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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what is worse than finding a dead worm in an apple? Obama being elected a second time

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? A family friend paying a visit.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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