Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

Have you ever just woken up one day and thought, "I don't wanna wear pants today."

Why couldn't the little girl walk? She was raped by a herd of black men, resulting in irreversible damage to her rectum and groin area.

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

Come in

Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

What do you do when your dish washer breaks? divorce her.

Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

YOU

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...