Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

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Bark I'm a tree

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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What's green and goes 100 miles an hour? a green racing car

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Derp

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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why couldn't the the black man get a job? because he doesn't posses the correct work ethic.

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A black guy bought fried chicken and grape soda and decided to eat in the park. He had a sip of the grape soda and said "aaaaaaahhh grape drank!" There was a man dressed in a grape coustume drinking out of the fountain.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

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I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

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Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

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Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Parents are very similar to trees. They fall over when hit repeatedly with an ax.

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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What do you call a guy named Bob hanging by a string? Plum Bob

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

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Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

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i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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