Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

wots brown and smells like shite shite

Joe is a negotiator. When joe sees someone in trouble, he tries to help them out of it by talking. Joe failed to talk to Osama bin laden correctly. Joe is no longer living in this world. Joe drank his sorrows away and died from the alcohol in his body. Osama is completely unrelated to this, his family died in a car crash.

Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

How do you escape prison? Kill everyone in it hen once you have escaped find their families and viciously murder them. Are they going the send you back to prison? No because you will kill everyone.

Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

A man walks into a dairy. Most people will not get this as it is cultural slang and they will think it is referring to dairy products.Oh well. This was going to be a good joke.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

i may not know where you sleep. but, i spiked your drink with sleeping pills

What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

why did the chicken cross the rode?????? i dont know because he felt like it???????????p.s.i actually dont know why he crossed the rode so go ask the next who makes a joke about a chicken crossing a rode?

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

What happens when two black people go into a store with masks on? They buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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