How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What's worse than aids? Super aids.

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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How does a black guy call to another black guy in Africa? using a telephone

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

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Your mom went to college

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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