Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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Who invented the Iceberg Salad? The Titanic

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Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a coke. The bartender looks at the gentlemen with a little smile and says "Just a coke?"

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

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Why did the chicken cross the park? To get to the other slide.

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J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

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brett is a dick

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Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

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whats the difference between a door knob? a milk carton, because people have legs so they can walk !!!!!

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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What is more tragic than a nice day wasted? Obesity.

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Terraria

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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What do you call a black thing hanging from a tree A tire swing

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I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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