Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

Yo momma is so old that she will be moved to a nursing home next week.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

Im batman...suck it losers

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

Shape like a book, have papers like a book, have a cover like a book, and could be read like a book. But it's not a book, what is it? A dictionary

Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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