What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

Women's Rights

I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

how do you starve a man who is on welfare? hide his food stamps under his work boots.

Why did Hitler kill the Jews? He didn't, the people he told to kill them did.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why didn't the man win the lottery? Because his lottery numbers weren't drawn.

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and their friend Satan asked if they heard about Jesus, and they said No.

Worms don't like apples.

240

69

What's funny about 4 black people going off a cliff in a Cadillac? Nothing. You're adopted

Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...