Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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What do you say to seduce a woman? Is that a mustache? WTF!

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What is the only thing worse than being a smelly Jew in 1944? Being a Jew in 1944 to hit the showers.

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

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If you make an anti joke out of an existing anti joke, does it become a new anti joke? Yes. No.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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How do you get rid of door knocker? You run at them with a chainsaw.

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What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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Why did Bob Marley Shoot the Sheriff? Because he was black.

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What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

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What is yellow and fluffy? Green fluff, I lied about the yellow part.

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Wanna hear a joke about a baby with AIDS? It never gets old.

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she had no arms. knock knock? who's there? not sally.

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Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

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Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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