What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a convicted rapist.

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

which of the following is right -the yoke is white -the yoke are white neither the yoke is yellow

Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

Q: Why did the man have no legs? A: He lost them when his humvee hit a roadside bomb during his last tour in Iraq.

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread.

why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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