an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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Communism

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do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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Paper shield.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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your so fat. your fat!

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Where are you going Your house

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What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

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Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

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Q: What's worse than the holocaust. A: Me not getting my Christmas presents.

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Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: A sad, unfortunate dog.

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Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops