A chronic hemophilliac walks into a bar. He cuts himself and bleeds to death.

Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

A jew went to Germany.

>posts joke >mistaken for anti-joke

Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

Golf.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

Of two wrongs don't make a right what do they make? I don't know but three rights make a left

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue The mothership came and your did a whole lot of scam

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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