What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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roses are red and violets are in fact violet

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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God made rivers God made lakes God made you We all make misstakes

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Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

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(read this aloud): A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. Him and the giraffe order multiple shots and get hammered. The giraffe on the other hand can't hold his liquor so well, and ends up passing out on the floor of the bar. The man decides to leave him there and take off. On his way out, the bartender yells, "Hey, you can't just leave that lyin' there!" and the man says, "It's not a lion, it's a giraffe!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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What's worse than death? Nothing.

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Make some fucking lemonade.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

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What's better than winning gold at the special Olympics? Not being retarded. - Blake Woodman

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Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

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do you wanna hear a joke about pizza? sure. naw,its too cheesy

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Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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