"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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What two states don't have running water? Solid and gas

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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A skeleton goes to a bar an orders a human flesh.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

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What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Osama Bin Laden. Oh wait...

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, chocolate milk.

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What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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whats black white and read all over a zebra bleeding to death because a zombie just attacked it and then it attackeed the zombie

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Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Why did the polar bear cross the road? He didn't, there are no roads in Antarctica.

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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Unless you yourself put you trough that pain and misery, you have no reason to dislike or flee from who you are.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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