Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did the hipster get burned? Because he was a volunteer fireman.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the black man run when he heard police sirens? Because he was parked in a handicap spot

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the lone KKK member do when he passed 10 large, muscular black men in the street? He did not tell them that he was a member of the KKK.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? It's a spicy sort of stew, you'd enjoy it.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the police say to the black man who just shot his wife? You are under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops