What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo mamma is so old that she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You're not that bad...you're still better at giving hand jobs than your dad is."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the little boy fall down? Because he was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happend to the boy with no family? he died in a tragic car accident along with his family

thumb_up thumb_down -12

anti jokes aren't always funny on here

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy want to commit suicide? Because he didn't want to die.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops