What's that in the road.... a-head?

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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What do you call a mexican running out of a bank? A man running late to pick up his kids.

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A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

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What's blue and white and can't climb a tree? A fridge in a denim jacket!

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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Why is it incorrect that the universe will end in 2012? Because profound idiocy doesn't always occur.

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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