What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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What is Mario's favorite food? I don't know. You should ask him.

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crips r blue bloodz r red choose crips nd thn ur dead (bloodz swoopp)

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I like apples. So does Mr. Johnson from the local fruit stand.

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what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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Why was my teacher depressed? Because she wanted to live in her pasta

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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How do you blindfold and Asian? By using a sturdy bandanna, cloth, any other object to avert ones view.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a building? He got hit by a bus on the way down.

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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1 Jew XD

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why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

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Two cows are in a field. Suddenly, from behind a bush, a rabbit leaps out and runs away. Martin was a lonely man

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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