How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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What did the giraffe say to the walrus? Nothing. Giraffes can't talk. What did the Scotsman say to the walrus? Nothing. Scotsmen can't talk.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies nailed to one tree? 10 living babies nailed to one tree

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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What did the Catholic priest say after he fell off a cliff? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: What is worse than a dead baby in a trashcan? A: A dead baby in 10 trashcans.

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What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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A blind man walks into a bar with a guide dog in one hand and his girlfriend in the other. The bartender says "Nice dog." The blind man says "Thanks."

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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What is brown and has 15 legs? (They answer "What?") Reply: I don't know I was hoping you would.

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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