What happened to the fish? It drowned

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Life is like a bridge. You get walked on all your life until you fall apart.

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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why did tommy cry?his mother killed his turtle on christmas

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What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

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Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

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Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

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what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rather sleep in the class Like a boss in the school -HairyBoss

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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a Polar bear in an Igloo.

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

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roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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