A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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why did the family have dinner? they were hungry and it was 6:00

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Did you hear what happened to the blonde ice hockey team? They drowned in spring training.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

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Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit halfway by a car.

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What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

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Q: Why was George Washington buried on a hill? A: Because he's dead.

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? Nothing, fishes don't speak, and due to their short memory he's probably forgotten about the event already, although he may have a pretty bad headache

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Why are kids with Aspergers Syndrome always banned from Mcdonalds? Let me repeat that: Ass Burgers.

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What is the difference between a duck? One of it's legs are both the same!

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What's worse than having you're leg fall asleep? Getting Polio

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart? A: Through her ribcage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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