How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A White guy, Black guy and Hispanic are all on the same bus. They get off at their predetermined stops and continue their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two farmers are standing in a field. One says: "It's a bit cold today, don't you think?" The other doesn't reply, because he is trying to work out how to tell the first farmer that his son has just been killed in a road accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +793

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's white and looks like a refrigerator? A baseball

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black man, Jew, and Asian walk into a bar... What does the bartender say? get out.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a chicken and was probably not aware that it was walking across a road at all, especially considering that it was likely in a low-traffic rural area.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

170

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

thumb_up thumb_down -6

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

And so the Lord said unto John "Come forth and receive eternal life," but John came fifth, and won a toaster instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Did you hear about the Nun in the Twin Towers? Yeah, she died too

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops