why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

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Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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WTF BOOOOOM

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Your so gay, that you like men!

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Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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how do you french braid? ask a french dude to braid your hair DUHH

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Why did John fall off his bike? Because, he is a fish and fish cannot ride bikes.

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If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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Why couldn't the baby walk through the door? Babies can't walk

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Your mother is so fat when she jumps she comes backs down.

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why did the computer crash? it didn't

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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