What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

I need to start studying.

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

Women's rights

throbbing slobber

What do you get when you cross a lion with a rhinoceros? A trip to the hospital and animal cruelty charges.

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What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

Q. what has 2 legs and can't walk A. a paraplegic

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Losing a family member in 9/11.

jack shine has boobs

Catholicism.

What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

What's wrong with four black people in a cadillac driving off a cliff? The Cadillac holds 5

Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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