what did charlie sheen do when his ex wife insulted him? he horribly abused her

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away."

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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Knock, Knock. Come In.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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Mary had a big white van, a big white van, a big white van, Mary had a big white van, where did my friend go? (sing the song)

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yo mamas so fat she probably has to wear a gerdle when she leaves the house.

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What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

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GONNA

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Q: What did the dumb blonde say when she opened a box of Cheerios? A: Look! Donut seeds!

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Two fish are in a tank. It is an average sized tank designed to hold aquatic animals.

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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Q.When is a dog, not a dog? A. never

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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knock knock who's there police

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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