ASSCHEEKS

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse

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There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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a black guy with rights in 1924

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little Tommie is dead In a body bag Going to the dumpster Behind my house

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What do a plane and a flight attendant have in common? They're both going somewhere in their careers. Aside from the flight attendant.

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LOL. It's East vs LA and Durant

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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ALL OF YOU NO MORE CURSING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT POSSABLE SO DON'T LISTEN

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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how did the little girl get to heaven? she died.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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what's worse than finding an worm in your apple? Finding HALF a worm in your apple.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

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What happpens when a Jew walks into a wall with a boner? He breaks his nose

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Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

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How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

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What's the difference between working at Mc Donalds and working as a hooker? A hooker gets paid more.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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