Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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whats the fastest way to be murdered tell your wife your cheating on her

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Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

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Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

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Your mama's so stupid because she has down syndrome.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

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Women's Rights...

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A man enters a bar. Two minutes later, a woman leaves a bar. What happened? A man entered a bar and a woman left. What's there to explain?

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If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Why did man push another man off of a building? Because he is a homocidal maniac and should be in federal prison

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Why cant Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles read? Because they are blind you racist.

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Why can no one in africa read or write? I would asume the lack of public education combined with the fact that setting up an education system for so many widespread remote comunities would be a logistical nightmare. But then again I have never been to africa and know little about the country and so the premise of this joke is probably a dramatic overstatement in the first place.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

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i am predestal

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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